It's hard to make friends.

That's what I've realized about becoming an adult.

No longer am I surrounded by people who are at the same stage of life as me. In fact, I am rarely around anyone who is at the same stage of life as me.

I am an almost 26 year old christian newlywed, with a 'career' of sorts, annnnnd no children yet. 

So because I don't fit into any of the typical crowds, I end up watching Anne of Green Gables on a Saturday afternoon, wishing I had a Diana to be my bosom frend. Haha. But then she was like into Gilbert and I would not have been as gracious as Anne. Maybe that's the problem. I am a little hard to like. I say what I think too much. Or I hold back and then get really mad because I can't say what I'm thinking.

I have felt really alone for about 4 months now.

Yesss, I know, I have Ryan. And he is truly wonderful. But he is a guy's guy. Like Tim the Toolman Taylor/Hank Hill/any other stereotypical man you can think of. That's my husband. He's not a shopping buddy. He can't stay awake through anything that even resembles a girl movie. He hates Panera Bread. I mean, all the things I love to do on a Saturday afternoon. Shop, movie, Panera!

It's exhausting pretending I am a-okay. You don't lose your best friend and not feel it.